Cast Your Bread Upon the Waters

Audrey Hepburn is credited for saying, “To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow.” And what a beautiful idea and sentient; that truly in our plans we can see and demonstrate our faith and hope in the future. I have experienced this conversation, many times as of late, in the negative. The debate not over the decision to garden but whether or not to have children. The conversation often, ripe with a disenchantment of politics or fatalistic news, turns from the common thought patterns of the collective media, and suddenly lands on the thought of bearing children.  Interesting. “I don’t want to bring children into such a terrible place.” they say, as if the antithesis of LIFE were truly preferred by them. In one turn of phrase the living becomes expert on what is best having never experienced the pangs of death or nothingness, themselves. I have learned this self-denial is often a trauma response or, at the very least, a sign of past pain; but the resignation and defeat embroiled in these words is still gut-wrenchingly felt by me.

Is the world so very bad as all that? Is there no stability, support, or hope for the future? I can appreciate the difficulty of bearing children in war-torn areas and times. I can image the fear and pain of feeling trapped by abusive and less-than-comfortable arrangements. Just in living I have, myself, experienced difficult and hard things. These factors are real, and yet I struggle with an attitude that says, “I would choose death over life.”

We are a nation who has lost its hope. Our culture sees children only for the burden they necessitate, and not for the strength they provide. It is a sad commentary on our worldview and the state of the family within the United States that more, and more couples choose to remain childless. People do not see the value of marriage or children in a correct light. Perhaps it is because of our own sin-marred relationships and dysfunctional families? With economic pressures on the rise, the quiet decision to forego the hope of a nuclear family is easily made. Government, too, often rewards and aides poor choices while penalizing those who are in families. It is not an intentional slight, but one where there will always be a loophole to exploit when money is distributed through a legislated “boxes checked” approach that is opposed to common sense and accountability. We need honest and morally upright citizens to make important judgments about what is just and fair, do we not? But, that I a separate issue.

For the young, the shift in thinking comes naturally.  They seek to establish themselves before starting a family. A focus on excelling, an emphasis on personal goals and dreams, career, travel, or opportunity all seem to take precedence. Many have postponed relationships and the blessing of children in pursuit of things more easily done without the responsibility of a family. At some point, the ideal becomes harder to find, the amount of respectable singles diminishes, and a body that could once support life begins to struggle.  Many have missed their chances for a family simply by delaying too long. Some choose to pursue their own way and timing but in the process unwittingly ensure their isolation and loneliness. There are seasons to life that we cannot often cheat.

Furthermore, our isolation has removed the multigenerational layers of family that were present in the past and with it the distribution of child care, housing costs, and generational wisdom. We are reduced to individuals competing with other individuals for everything, where fundamentally, just a hundred year ago, the fabric of our society was built on families working for the good of the whole. In many ways we have lost our culture and by result a large part of our collective identity.  I believe this is why there is such a cultural push to identify your OWN truth and define you OWN… well, ….everything. So, whether in disappointment, or an attempt to manage, adapt, and self-sooth the feeble words are offered up as assurance, “It is better to not bring children into this difficult time.”

But the words ring empty.

Faith says, “Cast your bread upon the waters.” (Ecclesiastes 11) Faith says: Share and give liberally, “A portion to even or even to eight.” You can’t out-give God, He is limitless. You are not bound by your limited circumstances if you but ask the Father of All Things. Give out of your scarcity and see how He will provide.

This is one of the great lessons children(or God through them) have taught me from the very beginning.  That, though there are days I do not have what I need and there are times I am asked to serve and give out of my loss, the sacrifice is beautiful and worth every effort. Our culture struggles with sacrifice. He who fearfully observes the world, the metaphorical storms and clouds of life, will not sow.

Only God knows what the Spirit is doing and how He will move. And so scripture admonishes us to sow day and night, when you are young and when you are old, in season and out of season, let God bring the harvest.  The only sure way to never reap anything of value is to never invest. The only sure way to harvest something is to never give up. So what?! Your tomato harvest was a laughable affair. How did your sunflowers do?

This principle lived out can look an infinite number of ways but each one takes faith. Our God is a good God who gives abundantly! He loves His children and gives them many promises that are found in His Word.  He is trustworthy! It I because of God’s protection and care that a Christian can live bravely and make decisions based in faith.

God’ promises extend not only for the barren or unwed, but for the broken. The promise is for women who have been misled and used, women who would not give birth due to inability or choice, both the loved and the unloved- alike. It is a hope for mothers and fathers, sons and daughters. It is for everyone, every season, and every situation. It is not that there are no consequences when we make decisions in error or rebellion, but rather, that upon true repentance, and in giving the situation to God, there is always the hope of restoration.

It IS available.

It is about faith, rooted in hope, and shown through love. This hope is what makes life worth living and it is found in Jesus Christ, alone. How does a mother laugh in the face of uncertain times and embrace additional hardship for the benefit of another(even her child)? How does a couple make the choice to bring a child into a world that is hard, unforgiving, and cruel? The world has always been thus, and while children are not ready to wisely navigate these places, God does provided a certain amount of grace and flexibility, an innocence that protects our children until they mature. It is He that protects and provides, directs and sustains.  Too often, our goal is a life of abundance or autonomy. Can life still be good when it is difficult and chased? Absolutely. Our only source of security and inner peace is Jesus, let the rest lie where it might.

In Christ, we can make plans for the future and know, that God is sovereign over ourselves and the choices of others. He is for us and not against us.

Life is beautiful because of Him.

Human life is sacred because if Him.

And having children is a blessing-All, because of Him!

Bringing a little light into a dark world does not mean the darkness will cease to be, only that your little corner in it will be that much brighter. Without faith we are fearful of the future. Without faith we are unable to endure. Without hope we are stuck in old patterns and destructive thinking. Without love we are like specters, shadows of what could be. Every time we try to protect our own selfish interests, we loose out on the benefit and blessing that following God’s will provides. We will all have some level of sorrow in our lives, but to accept God’s plan for YOUR life and live in faith will always lead to a good and happy existence.

So, let us not believe in tomorrow for tomorrow’s sake, alone. But trust the one who will ultimately turn all deserts into gardens (Isaiah 35). Plant in the deep and dusty furrows of life today and wait for the roots of God’s promises to take hold.

Ecclesiastes 11:1-7

Cast your bread upon the waters,
    for you will find it after many days.

Give a portion to seven, or even to eight,
    for you know not what disaster may happen on earth.

If the clouds are full of rain,
    they empty themselves on the earth,
and if a tree falls to the south or to the north,
    in the place where the tree falls, there it will lie.

He who observes the wind will not sow,
    and he who regards the clouds will not reap.

As you do not know the way the spirit comes to the bones in the womb of a woman with child, so you do not know the work of God who makes everything.

In the morning sow your seed, and at evening withhold not your hand, for you do not know which will prosper, this or that, or whether both alike will be good.

Light is sweet, and it is pleasant for the eyes to see the sun.